Duck Season
It had just gone sunrise. Nestled along the steaming banks of the wide canal, six of us crouched in the camouflaged hut known as a 'Mai mai'. Some had already been drinking Port, I could still smell dope and perhaps unbelievably, I was the only one there not dressed up as some kind of paramilitary reject. All of us had shotguns; double barrels, semiautomatic and pump action.
This was to be my first taste of opening season. Decoy mallards bobbed in the canal in front of our position and sporadically, we could hear the honk of phony duck calls carrying to us from neighbouring properties and further down the body of water.
Then they came. A frantic exodus of feathered bodies, desperately seeking sanctuary. We could hear their panic. Harried mercilessly from lake to creek, they banked towards the lures we had placed. Only to be greeted by the barrage of fire we opened upon them. A veritable hail of lead shot poured into them from our little bunker as we fired again and again. Some were struck dead in flight while others were shredded, disintegrated or just blown limb from limb.
The Labrador pups at our feet whined and cowered under the concussion of the rapid shotgun fire. Then it was over, the survivors flying desperately onwards in futile retreat.
The guys whooped and cheered while I think I managed a sickly grin. High five.
Sliding back the corrugated iron hatch to our hut, the Lab's scrambled free and plunged into the water, pushing through the carnage to seek any ducks unlucky enough to have survived our gunfire.
So ended day one of Duck Season, my first and last experience with it.
I was working as a farmer at the time and the life and death of animals was often in my hands. Some of those creatures I loved, some I hated. They had personalities. I had taken those lives before and more than once I experienced a living creature's life blood pour onto my hands, which is something I still find hard to justify. I'm not a vegan or a peacenik and I strive not to be a hypocrite. I've slaughtered, euthanized and hunted. In short, I'm not an innocent.
To me, Duck "hunting" is no such thing. It is a bloodthirsty massacre of terrified creatures. It is inane butchery on a wide scale ...and it's as Kiwi as Lion Red.
Poll: Do you set New Year’s resolutions?
🎉 2026 is almost here!
We’re curious ... how do you welcome it?
Do you set resolutions, follow special traditions, or just go with the flow?
-
10.3% Yes! New Year, New Me
-
20.3% Yes - but I rarely stick to them
-
69.3% Nah - not for me
🎉The Riddler wants to hear from you 🫵
🧩 Got a riddle that can stump your Neighbourly community? Share your brain teasers with us and watch your neighbours scratch their heads 😕🤔❓
Send us your tricky puzzles!
Witnesses sought in relation to mass disorder on K-Road Auckland
Police are appealing to the public for any footage they may have of the mass disorder that occurred on Karangahape Road in Auckland in the early hours of Sunday 28 December.
Emergency services were called to the disorder around 3.41am where it is estimated around over 50 people were present.
A Police investigation is underway after there were three serious assaults on and around Karangahape Road during the mass disorder.
A portal has been set up to allow the public to upload any footage they have of the disorder and the serious assaults.
The portal is https://dahr.nc3.govt.nz/
Police have arrested one person but are asking for help to identify and locate others involved.
• Around 4:15am there was a serious assault outside the Crown Bar on Queen Street.
A 33-year-old man received serious injuries and was hospitalised.
The offender is still unknown, and the Police file number is 251228/4647.
• Around 4:30am there was another serious assault on a Cobden Steet just off Karangahape Road.
A 27-year-old man received serious injuries and was hospitalised.
The offender is still unknown, and the Police file number is 251228/4462.
• Around 5am there was third serious assault at the Mobil Service Station on the corner or Karangahape Road and Ponsonby Road.
A 46-year-old man received serious injuries and was hospitalised.
A 21-year-old man has been charged with wounding with intent to cause grievous bodily harm.
He has been bailed to appear in court again on 16 January 2026.
The Police file number is 251228/4774.
Police would like to speak to anyone who has witnessed or filmed the assaults.
Witnesses can call Police directly on 105.
Please quote one of the above file numbers.
Loading…
