Wednesday's funny: 😄🏪Kmart Interview🏪 😄
Jennifer, a manager at Kmart had the task of hiring someone to fill a job opening.
After sorting through a stack of resumes she found four people who were equally qualified.
Jennifer decided to call the four in and ask them only one question. Their answer would determine which of them would get the job.
The day came and as the four sat around the conference room table, Jennifer asked, "What is the fastest thing you know of?"
The first man replied, "A THOUGHT. It just pops into your head. There's no warning."
"That's very good!" replied Jennifer. "And now you sir," she asked the second man.
"Hmmm... let me see... A BLINK! It comes and goes and you don't know that it ever happened. A BLINK is the fastest thing I know of."
“Excellent!" said Jennifer. "The blink of an eye, that's a very popular cliché for speed." She then turned to the third man, who was contemplating his reply.
"Well, out at my dad's farm, you step out of the house and on the wall there's a light switch. When you flip that switch, way out across the pasture the light on the barn comes on in less than an instant. Yep, TURNING ON A LIGHT is the fastest thing I can think of."
Jennifer was very impressed with the third answer and thought she had found her man. “It's hard to beat the speed of light," she said.
Turning to Ernest, the fourth and final man, Jennifer posed the same question.
Old Ernest replied, "After hearing the previous three answers, it's obvious to me that the fastest thing known is DIARRHEA."
"WHAT?" said Jennifer, stunned by the response.
"Oh sure," said Ernest. "You see, the other day I wasn't feeling so good, and I ran for the bathroom, but before I could THINK, BLINK, or TURN ON THE LIGHT, I had already popped my pants."
Ernest is the new greeter at the Kmart near you!
Poll: Have you ever been bullied?
People associate bullying with children in schools, but it can actually stretch beyond childhood to workplaces or neighbourhoods.
This Friday is Pink Shirt Day, which began in Canada in 2007 when two students took a stand against homophobic bullying after a new student was harassed for wearing pink. People across the globe are now encouraged to wear pink on this day to take a stand against bullying and promote inclusivity.
Have you or your whānau ever experienced bullying? Share your thoughts on Pink Shirt Day below.
Type 'Not For Print' if you wish your comments to be excluded from the Conversations column of your local paper.
-
81.4% Yes
-
18.6% No
-
0% Other - I'll share below
And the 2024 Prospa Local Business Hero is...
A huge congratulations to mother and son duo, Mary and Sam Danielson from The Puketapu Hotel.
The votes for all finalists have been tallied and they have been chosen by Neighbourly members across the country as the Prospa Local Business Hero of 2024.
The Puketapu Hotel was nominated by a local called Margaret and the nomination reads:
'On Feb 14, 2023, Cyclone Gabrielle flooded many of the rural areas. Puketapu Hotel went under perhaps half a meter of water. However, immediately Mary Danielson and her son, Sam Danielson, along with their loyal staff pulled it together to cook copious amounts of food that without electricity would have been wasted. Throughout the years many of us have been treated with a pub gathering where we can reconnect and a free meal. At Christmas there was Santa, games, gifts for kids, donated patchwork for adults, an ice cream truck and lots of camaraderie.
This February on the cyclone anniversary, they again pulled out the stops to give hundreds of us a special night. We are all tired of the cyclone cleanup and they understood that it was needed.'
Such a deserving business and team, well done Mary and Sam. And thank you to all those who voted!
Prizes! Prizes! Prizes!
We've randomly drawn the winners for our Tuesday prize draw. This week the prize is $100 grocery vouchers. Congratulations to:
Katie Stuart from Karekare
Vernon Barlow from Invercargill
Pauline De Lira from Taupo
Muhammed Azam from Ōtahuhu
Are you a winner? Get in touch with our Neighbourly team here to claim your prize.
Not a winner this time? Come back each Tuesday and we will have ongoing prize draws and more winners!
Loading…
