40 days ago

WARNING from an Old Lady....

Alison Neighbourly Lead from Kamo

"An older lady gets pulled over for speeding"...
Older Woman: Is there a problem, officer?
Officer: Ma'am, you were speeding.
Older Woman: Oh, I see.
Officer: Can I see your license please?
Older Woman: I'd give it to you but I don't have one.
Officer: Don't have one?
Older Woman: Lost it, 4 years ago for drunk driving.
Officer: I see...Can I see your vehicle registration papers please.
Older Woman: I can't do that.
Officer: Why not?
Older Woman: I stole this car.
Officer: Stole it?
Older Woman: Yes, and I killed and hacked up the owner.
Officer: You what?
Older Woman: His body parts are in plastic bags in the trunk if you want to see
The Officer looks at the woman and slowly backs away to his car and calls for back up. Within minutes 5 police cars circle the car. A senior officer slowly approaches the car, clasping his half drawn gun.
Officer 2: Ma'am, could you step out of your vehicle please!
The woman steps out of her vehicle.
Older woman: Is there e a problem sir?
Officer 2: One of my officers told me that you have stolen this car and murdered the owner.
Older Woman: Murdered the owner?
Officer 2: Yes, could you please open the trunk of your car, please.
The woman opens the trunk, revealing nothing but an empty trunk.
Officer 2: Is this your car, ma'am?
Older Woman: Yes, here are the registration papers.
The officer is quite stunned.
Officer 2: One of my officers claims that you do not have a driving license.
The woman digs into her handbag and pulls out a clutch purse and hands it to the officer.
The officer examines the license. He looks quite puzzled.
Officer 2: Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner.
Older Woman: Bet the liar told you I was speeding, too.

Don't Mess With Old Ladies

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More messages from your neighbours
3 days ago

We Say/You Say: trans-Tasman bubble

Thomas Campbell Reporter from Whangarei Leader

Hi Whangārei!

After more than a year of closed borders, Australians and New Zealanders will soon be able to jet-hop between countries after the government announced that the trans-Tasman travel bubble is to be operational from April 19.

With quarantine-free travel now possible, are you more likely to head across the Tasman or travel domestically?

Fronting Australian media yesterday, Jacinda Ardern not only spoke of the excitement of families being able to be reunited, but also pitched New Zealand tourist activities to Australian viewers.

"If there is a hot spot in one of the states of Australia we may just act in the same way that another state would ... Just prepare that there may be disruptions, but what better place in the world to be stuck. Am I right?," she said.

The trans-Tasman bubble will operate on a three tier basis: Continue, Pause and Suspend. If there are a few cases in Australia linked to the border, quarantine-free travel will continue. Travel may be paused for 72 hours if there are rogue community cases and in the instance of a state or nationwide lockdown, travel will be suspended.

Share your thoughts below and don't forget to type NFP if you don't want your comment featured in the Conversations page of the Whangārei Leader.

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1 day ago

Independence with support you can count on

Ryman Healthcare Limited

Serviced apartments come with the support that makes life easier.

Your fixed base weekly fee includes a chef-prepared meal every day, morning and afternoon tea and housekeeping.

Your electricity, heating, air-conditioning costs and building maintenance are also covered, providing you with certainty about your living expenses.
Learn more

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1 day ago

Wildlife Conservation Science at work

Auckland Zoo

Auckland Zoo’s High Canopy is now open – a spectacular new habitat for siamangs and orangutans!

Spot the primates as they live the high life, swinging 25 meters off the ground! The new sky-high habitat lets them behave and move as they would in the wild.

Visit Auckland Zoo with your whanau these school holidays.

Book your ticket online here.
Find out more

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